Week #260 – The Hard Work of Happyness (Reflections at the Five-Year Mark)

Greetings Happyness Tribe — and Welcome to WEEK #260!

(Not Week #300 as this post was originally mis-numbered!)

Five years ago on September 5th our world changed forever — and on September 8th, SpreadHappyness was born.

It seems like forever ago and just yesterday all at the same time. And sometimes, it feels like not at all.

(Like many, I still expect Rob to show up suddenly and tell us this was some silly joke. And we’d forgive him…and then go get something to eat!)

Because five years later, other than missing our brother/friend every single day and knowing that he’s gone, Rob still feels very present to me through all the people that knew him and loved him and enjoyed his company!

So let me take a moment once again to say THANK YOU to each and every one of you who have logged on, followed along, shared your thoughts, supported the effort, and above all — who’ve SPREAD HAPPYNESS this past year!!!  

Because I know it’s not always easy.

It’s not easy to smile, wave big and say hello like you mean it when you’re grumpy, or sad, or struggling.

(And that’s just Week #1 and #2!)

It’s not easy to reach out, to lend a hand, to mentor or encourage someone when your world feels like it’s falling apart.

It’s not easy to plan ahead, to set goals, or to try something new when your heart has been broken by disappointment…again and again.

Shoot…it’s not even easy to send mail! (I know this…because I am the worst!)

Five years and 260 posts later, I know Happyness seems simple…but it’s not always easy. It’s hard work. Because the reality is, some days the world gets the better of us…

…and other days, Happyness wins!

Your Happyness Challenge for the Week Ahead: Spread Happyness!!! Spread Happyness is not about being Happy. It’s about “Spreading” Happyness by making choices that uplift and elevate others…not tear them down. When you feel the world getting to you this week — or better yet, when you see it getting to someone else — roll up your sleeves and get to work. There is Happyness to Spread!!!

To life! To love!! To Happyness!!!

Spread Happyness — please share your thoughts in the comments!

9/6/19 by Grace Church
© Grace Church
grace@spreadhappyness.com

Week #259 – Summer Fun: It’s Labor Day Weekend!  (What’s left on your list?!)

Greetings, All — and Happy Friday!!!

I’ve been counting down the Fridays to Labor Day Weekend with some short “Summer Fun” suggestions.  Because —  as I’ve said each week — while many adults are busy planning their kids’ summer fun, they often overlook their own!

And here we are!  It’s Labor Day Weekend!

Do you know where your fun went?  😉

If not, don’t despair!  I know Labor Day Weekend marks the “unofficial” end of summer — but dedicated summer folks know there are really THREE FULL FRIDAYS on the calendar before the first day of Fall. Not to mention…the best weather (and parking for all you beach peeps) await!!!

There’s still time!!!

Your Happyness Challenge for the Week Ahead: What’s left on your list?  Is there something you wanted to do this summer but haven’t gotten to yet?  Is there a project or day trip or promise that you made that’s nagging at you?  There’s still three full weeks of summer left — and plenty of good weather to come!  Get out your calendar and GET IT DONE!!!  The best of summer can still be yet to come!!

(The rest of you are already decorating for Halloween…I just know it!)

Spread Happyness — share your thoughts in the comments!

8/30/19 by Grace Church
© Grace Church
grace@spreadhappyness.com

Week #258 – Summer Fun List: Mentor someone!

Greetings All — and Happy Friday!!!

I am counting down the Fridays to Labor Day Weekend with some short “Summer Fun” suggestions.  Because – as I’ve said each week – while many adults are busy planning their kids’ summer fun, they often overlook their own!

And I want to make sure you’re having fun too!

But maybe your kids are already back to school or off to college and you’ve got a little extra time or space in your schedule to start something new!

These precious last weeks of August are a powerful transition time for everyone.

Many newly minted high school graduates are headed off to college.  Last year’s sophomores are entering their all-important senior years.  There are college grads heading out into the workforce for maybe the first time ever.  And many of us adults like to use the power of August and September to make big changes at home or in our careers.

I wrote once about “Lowering the Ladder” to those who were launching a job search, seeking an internship, or looking to start their own businesses or side hustles at the start of the year.

The same rules apply now!

September is the new January…it’s a time of high energy and powerful possibilities. Gentle guidance and solid advice is hard to find…

…and a blessing to deliver!

If you have wisdom to share, here’s an easy way to Spread Happyness: mentor someone!

Your Happyness Challenge for the Week Ahead: Mentor someone!  Do you know someone headed off to college?  Into their senior year?  Or into a first job (or new job)?  Don’t wait for them to ask you for that oh-so-awkward informational interview.  Take the first step — and offer to take him/her out for lunch or coffee or a tour of your workplace.  Think of the people who helped you get where you are right now…that first contact, that first referral, that first interview or hire.  The first person who treated you like an adult!  The things you needed (not necessarily wanted) to hear! No matter what position you are in…you are more than likely in a position to help someone take their very next step.

Spread Happyness — mentor someone, and show them the way this week!

8/23/19 by Grace Church
© Grace Church
grace@spreadhappyness.com

Week #257 – Summer Fun List: Spread Good Words!  (Here are four easy ways to do it!)

Greetings, All — and Happy Friday!!!

We are counting down the Fridays between now and Labor Day Weekend with some short “Summer Fun” suggestions.  Because —  as I’ve said each week — while many adults are busy planning their kids’ summer fun, they often overlook their own!

So I want to make sure you’re having fun too!

Back-to-school is already in the works in some parts of the country — and one of my favorite things to see this time of year is moms/dads/family members finding creative ways to send their kids into a new/unknown year with words of encouragement.

Here are FOUR WAYS to spread good words to those headed back to school in the weeks ahead!

1. Rock Painting — This is part of a larger movement called “The Kindness Rocks Project” — which is apparently where it all started.  Chances are, someone in your county or region has a Facebook page set up to post pictures of painted rocks, hints about where they are hidden, and pictures of them being found.  The overall message is one of creativity, connection, and community.  And I cannot think of a better way to Spread Happyness than to plant inspiring messages for students to find on their way to/from school or when out running errands!

2. Sidewalk Chalking — Another Facebook friend (a mom in California) was busy decluttering all last summer when she discovered a bunch of sidewalk chalk.  Rather than dump it, she opted to write inspirational messages on her driveway/sidewalk to her kids as they headed back to school — and she invited other parents in her neighborhood to do the same!  The result — kids on their way to/from school were inundated by messages of love, encouragement, and wise advice as they began a new school year.

3. Parking Lot Painting/Chalking — Some schools around the country are allowing their students (especially seniors) to paint/chalk their parking spots for the year.  Check with your school first…but this may be something you can start in your own community.  Sending students into their senior years (especially) with words of wisdom and encouragement could be a beautiful thing!  (Just remember…be sure to check with your school first!)

4. Lunch Box Notes — Many of us remember finding notes in our brown bag lunches. In a world where communication is so instant and easy…it seems silly to take the time to write a physical note that may or may not get found in a lunch bag or briefcase. But finding that note is a signal to your kids (or someone you love) that you thought of them IN ADVANCE. It’s a way to be present with someone when you aren’t physically present with them — and to let them know they are important and known beyond their classroom/workplace.

What other ways could you spread words of love, encouragement, advice, or support to a returning student/teacher/administrator this week?

Your Happyness Challenge for the Week Ahead: Spread Good Words!  Whether it’s painting a rock, chalking a sidewalk or parking space, or hiding secret messages in lunch boxes and briefcases — find a way to spread good words to a student/teacher/administrator or first-time-parent-of-a-student this week!

Spread Happyness — and Spread Good Words!  🙂

8/16/19 by Grace Church
© Grace Church
grace@spreadhappyness.com

Week #256 – Summer Fun List: Watch the grass (or weeds) grow!

Greetings Tribe — and Happy Friday!

We are counting down the Fridays to Labor Day Weekend with some short “Summer Fun” suggestions because (I’ll keep saying it) — while many adults are busy planning their kids’ summer fun, they often overlook their own!

But this week, I want you to stop what you’re doing for a red-hot second…and watch the grass (or weeds) grow!

Back home in New Jersey…Queen Anne’s Lace is everywhere this time of year. It’s a flirty little weed that always got my attention in late July — and seemed to yell at me:

“Hey you…look around! It’s almost August!”

And here we are!

There is a wonderful stillness this time of year as summer reaches its peak. Gardens are bursting, trees are at their fullest, the grass is at its longest…but harvest season isn’t quite here yet. There seems to be nothing left to do except sit back and watch it all grow.

Of course, with our modern schedules and technology there is always plenty to do: work continues, activities go on, there are vacations to take, and places to visit, and back-to-school shopping to do…

…but nature knows better.

Get out in nature. Take a cue from your garden or lawn, flower bed or park! Make like a tree…and be still! 😉

Your Happyness Challenge for the Week Ahead: Watch the grass (or weeds) grow! Back to school is about to start…but before it does, take a minute to kick back with your favorite beverage (and maybe your favorite person or pet) and watch the grass grow (or a thunderstorm brew)! It may be uncomfortable to sit still and do (gasp!) nothing for a few minutes. Do it anyway! Try it. Take five or fifteen minutes once a day (or once this week) to sit in the same spot and notice what is happening around you. I know the clock is ticking…but our world keeps its very own perfect time.

“Live each season as it passes; breathe the air, drink the drink, taste the fruit, and resign yourself to the influences of each.” (Henry David Thoreau)

Spread Happyness — where do you like to stop and watch the weeds grow?

8/9/19 by Grace Church
© Grace Church
grace@spreadhappyness.com

Week #255 – Summer Fun List: It’s County Fair Time!!!

Greetings, All — and Happy Friday!!!

I’m counting down the Fridays to Labor Day Weekend with some short “Summer Fun” suggestions.  Because —  as I’ve said each week — while many adults get busy planning their kids’ summer fun, they often overlook their own!

And I want to make sure you’re having fun too!

This week we WELCOME AUGUST — and you know what that means:

It’s County Fair Time!!!

August is the official start of Harvest Season — which means it’s the time of year for county fairs or farm and horse shows.  And no matter how magical Disney may be, or how great an adventure Six Flags is…there is nothing like staying local and taking in your town’s carnival, county fair, or farm and horse show!

And while you’re there, don’t forget to RIDE the RIDES!!!  You can get some scream therapy on a roller coaster, battle it out on bumper cars, let loose on the swings, or laugh yourself silly on the Rock-n-Roll Express.

But if you find yourself saying, “I’ll wait right here…” — take that as a cue to buy yourself a ticket, a token, or a wristband and GET IN LINE!  It’s easy to sit back and watch…but it’s more fun to get over yourself, get in line, and be a kid again!  (Bonus — waiting on line with your spouse/kid/friend/loved-one offers great conversation time.)

I’m once again hoping to hit the Ventura County Fair this Saturday (or next) to listen to some music, take a look at the livestock and garden displays, and maybe catch a little rodeo!  We may even get in line for an amusement or two…especially a ride on the Ferris Wheel!

So Spread Happyness this week — and take your baby to the carnival!  🙂

Your Happyness Challenge for the Week Ahead: “Take your baby to the carnival!”  Whether it’s the town carnival, county fair, or your favorite boardwalk…grab the ones you love and head out for a night of fresh air, food trucks, and festivities.  Ride some rides, play some games, walk in circles, and watch the fireworks.  Farm and horse shows also offer educational opportunities, history lessons, and local participation and competition that you won’t find at a corporate theme park.  So get out there…ride some rides, and have some fun at the fair!!!

Spread Happyness — get out to the carnival, fair, or farm and horse show this week!

8/2/19 by Grace Church
© Grace Church
grace@spreadhappyness.com

Week #254 – Summer Fun List: Hit the Porch! (…or deck, or patio, or tailgate…)

Greetings Happyness Tribe — and Happy Friday!

I recently returned to Los Angeles from a whirlwind visit back home at the Jersey Shore.  It was another fast and busy trip centered around a yearly concert in Ocean Grove’s Great Auditorium — which is always one of the single busiest weeks of the summer (and this year, one of the hottest!).  

Between singing in the concert and grabbing slices of time with family — there wasn’t much time to schedule other activities, visits, or downtime.

Which always makes porch-hopping so precious!!!

Porch-hopping is a special kind of visiting…no planning, no deadlines, no expectations.  You simply make yourself available and see who passes by!  It’s not a date for an entire day or evening…it’s grab-and-go.  Take what you can.  Just a few precious moments of eternal NOW.

And you learn to make it count!

For “the town where time stands still” — summers move pretty fast in Ocean Grove!  After three years now in Southern California, where there’s always another beautiful day, I could really feel the frenzy.  Running here, running there, trying to “get it all in.”

The only way to still time, it seems…is to be still myself.

We’re just about at the end of July. If you feel like your summer is flying by, going too fast, or slipping through your fingers…don’t panic.  Power down!  Make yourself available.  Hit the porch (or deck, or patio, or tailgate…)!

Sit down…and rock a while!

Your Happyness Challenge for the Week Ahead: Hit the Porch!  Whether you have a porch, deck, patio, balcony, or tailgate — pull up a chair, take a load off, sit a spell, have a chat, visit a bit, or rock a while!  Watch the traffic pass, cars park, people walk by, critters hard at work, nature doing her thing, or just observe the world moving about while you sit still.  Invite someone to join you.  Share a glass of something cold, have a conversation, meet a neighbor, visit with friends, or get to know just a little bit more about your very own family.

The world is moving fast…make porch time a priority this week!

Spread Happyness — tell me, what’s your favorite place for a nice long sit?

7/26/19 by Grace Church
© Grace Church
grace@spreadhappyness.com

Week #253 – Summer Fun List: Hit the Water! (Dedicated to our childhood friend and neighbor, Dean Morris)

Greetings Happyness Tribe!

This post comes of the heels of hearing about another loss from the old neighborhood. Dean may have grown up, moved out, and moved on to his very own family and business — but in my mind he was always the fun-loving kid next door who was ready to play the next game, come up with the next plan, or figure out the next adventure. Memories of him are always accompanied by the smell and taste of chlorine from his family’s pool — a place where all the neighborhood kids gathered to cool down, act up, and chill out during the hotter-than-hell summers of our youth.

News of his passing came to me last week when I was home in Ocean Grove — and after thinking about his wife, children, and family — I immediately thought of the pool. How I learned to swim, dive, and even open my eyes under water…right there in that big pool on the old block.

It reminded me of my post from way back on Week #45, when I mentioned that very same pool and challenged us to “Get Wet!” So here it is again…because Dean (and my brother, and another neighbor-boy named Brian) may be gone…but those memories, oh those summer fun memories, they last FOREVER!

Your Happyness Challenge for the Week Ahead: GET WET!!!  I know many of you are living in areas with record temps right now — and with that comes the tendency to limit physical activity.  Sometimes the heat just makes it plain hard to move.  But don’t despair!  Head to your favorite lake, pool, or watering hole and jump in!  When we were kids — we spent HOURS in our neighbor’s pool playing Marco Polo, Aquaman, and other pool games.  As teens — we headed to the community pool to practice our can-openers, watermelons, and cannon-balls off the high dive!  Now — as working adults — we each still head to the water after a long hot day of work or commuting.  There is nothing like the attitude adjustment that comes after a long, cold soak in the pool (or lake or ocean) — not to mention the sleep that comes afterward!

So beat the heat…and GET WET this week!

Spread Happyness — and share your favorite water activities in the comments!

7/19/19 by Grace Church
© Grace Church
grace@spreadhappyness.com

Week #252 – Summer Fun List: “Hit the Boards!”

Greetings Happyness Tribe!!!

I’m back in Ocean Grove this week!  Holy Ground, God’s Square Mile, and Heaven on Earth!!!

And all I can think about is this post…from Week #43.  So forgive the repeat…because I am busy “walking the boards and riding the waves!”  (I know you understand!)

Just four short years ago now…a new memorial planter quietly appeared on the boardwalk in Ocean Grove.  The planter’s inscription reads:

Robert Church, Jr.  1974-2014
Walked these boards and rode the waves.
Loved and Remembered Always

Since Rob disappeared from our boardwalk in 2014 — I still, even today, will look to see his 6-foot-something frame, his big wave, and his confident stride.  And with every turn onto Ocean Avenue — I’ll be reminded, once again, of his absence in this beautiful place.  A place we shared as a family since childhood — and continued to share into our adulthood.

A place we somehow, even now, continue to share today.  ♥

Through all the years we visited Ocean Grove — as children, teens, adults, and friends — we never dreamed it would come to this.  Benches and planters were for old people, maybe even pets, but not for us.  We were young, vital, alive.

And THAT is the point of the plaques on those benches and planters.  Life is about what you do, where you do it, and who you do it with.  The planters and benches along the boardwalk are filled with legacies: “…who loved Ocean Grove…”, “…who helped us all to grow…”, “whose happiness was a day at the beach…”

What would yours say?

This week’s assignment: “WALK THE BOARDS!  RIDE THE WAVES!”  Spend time doing YOUR favorite activity!  If someone were to write a memorial plaque about you…what would it say?  Where would they put it?  Spend time there doing that thing as if it was your last.  Imagine how you might want to be remembered…then make it a point to LIVE IT!  Do it with love…do it with laughter…and above all: do it with Happyness!

Don’t wait!  Live your legacy today! And enjoy every moment! (I know I am!)

Spread Happyness — share your thoughts in the comments!

7/12/19 by Grace Church
© Grace Church
grace@spreadhappyness.com

Week #251 – Summer Fun List: “Hit the Road!”

Greetings, All — and Happy Friday!

Once again, we are counting down the Fridays between now and Labor Day Weekend with some short “Summer Fun” suggestions.  Because I’ll keep saying it — while many adults are busy planning their kids’ summer fun, they often overlook their own!

And I want to make sure YOU have fun this summer, too!

This week, I’m revisiting the idea of taking a drive.  Whether it’s across country or across town — there’s a road trip for every budget. So fuel up and put the pedal down! The open road awaits!

But where?

Before you beat the usual path…get out an old fashioned map (or print one off the web) and draw a couple of circles around your town: a 50-mile radius, a 100-mile radius, and a 150-mile radius.

One Tank Trips are designed to work with your gas tank.  The average car can drive about 300 miles on one fill up — 150 miles out, 150 miles back.  That could mean 3.0 hours worth of driving though…and an overnight stay.  That’s why I recommend a 50-mile (under 1 hour) and 100-mile (under 2 hours) radius, as well.

• 150 miles: These destinations are likely to require a little planning, some advanced preparations, and possibly an overnight stay.  Don’t just look to the beach or the lakes…look for parks for camping, mountains for climbing, historic towns for exploring, or amusement parks for a full day of fun.  From the Jersey Shore, this covers a radius from West Point, NY to Lancaster, PA to Rehoboth Beach, DE and almost all of Long Island!  Where I am now in LA, this covers everything from the vineyards of Paso Robles to the streets of Tijuana — and out to Joshua Tree State Park!
• 100 miles:  These are your day trips.  Think of concerts, antiquing, hiking, swimming, museums, aquariums, and exploring.  From the Jersey Shore this includes Coney Island and Jones Beach to the East, Sleepy Hollow and the quaint little towns along the Hudson River to the North, Bethlehem and the Delaware Water Gap to the West, and Cape May and Atlantic City to the South!  Here in LA it means Santa Barbara, Orange County, or even Disneyland!
• 50 miles: These trips are less than one hour away.  Have lunch or dinner at a special place, plan an activity, organize a play date or reunion, attend a fair, pamper yourself, or spend some time on the porch with a friend!

Finally — and these are the fun ones — look in your own backyard!  Play tourist in your own town.  If a friend visited you — where would you absolutely have to take them?!  Where I live now — this definitely means a ride along the Pacific Coast Highway, a hike in the mountains, a visit to a studio, and a walk down Sunset Boulevard.  Back home, it would be a tour of my little Victorian town, and a romp through historic Asbury Park, or a drive around our beautiful lake — and definitely a stop at Cliff’s for ice cream!!!

Your Happyness Challenge for the Week Ahead: Hit the Road!  Gas up, stock some snacks, open your windows, and let your hair FLY!  (But wherever you go…please stay off your phone!)  Enjoy the scenery, talk with your travel companions, open the windows and breathe the air of a different place or town.  Listen to music, a podcast…or drive in silence.  Get out, explore, stretch your legs, meet some new people! — and let the good times roll!

Where would you go on a full tank of gas?

Spread Happyness — share your One Tank Trip ideas in the comments!!!

7/5/19 by Grace Church
© Grace Church
grace@spreadhappyness.com