Just Breathe (photo credit: Grace Church)

Week #100 – Just…Breathe.

Greetings Happyness Tribe — and Happy Friday!

It’s August…and the weeks ahead are marked with “anniversaries.”  As I look at my calendar, I’m reminded that these were the weeks where Rob’s health took rapid turns for the worse.  ER visits, treatments, doctor’s appointments.

While the rest of the world was enjoying the season he loved so much, he was increasingly forced to stay inside and struggle for just…one…breath.

For me, the next few weeks…the end of August…will always be a profound reminder:

• A reminder to wring the very most I can out of life.
• A reminder to live it fully without apologies.
• A reminder to forget about what’s not important…and focus on what is.  
• A reminder of how delicious life is…and how very temporary.  
• A reminder of how precious each breath is…and how quickly it can be taken away.
• A reminder to just…breathe.

Your Happyness Challenge for the Week Ahead: Just…Breathe.  The busyness of September is just ahead of us!  Some kids are already heading back to school.  Don’t let these weeks slip by without stopping for a moment to just…breathe!  Get outside…watch a sunset, listen to kids play, feel the breeze across your skin, relish a thunderstorm, gaze at a rainbow.  There may be a day when you’ll miss all of this.  Don’t miss it now!

“Live each season as it passes; breathe the air, drink the drink, taste the fruit, and resign yourself to the influences of each.”  (Henry David Thoreau)

Spread Happyness — Just breathe!  And share your thoughts in the comments!

8/12/16 by Grace Church
© Grace Church
grace@spreadhappyness.com

“Good Times” (photo credit: Grace Church)

Week #99 – Go Ahead…Reminisce (and Remember Together)

Greetings Happyness Tribe — and Happy Friday!

There’s been a lot of nostalgia going around lately.  Maybe it’s the loss of yet another childhood friend.  Maybe it’s that late summer longing we feel to stop the clock or maybe even turn back time.  Maybe it’s just our parents cleaning out their attics.

Maybe it’s simply that it feels good to remember good times and good friends.

I had occasion to share a few old pictures with friends this week.  One had lost his childhood friend and neighbor.  Another lost her brother a decade ago.  And yet another lost her son.

As I came across the photos, it occurred to me that I should NOT share them.  What if it hurt the person receiving them?  What if it was a bad time?  What if they weren’t thinking of that person right then and there?

And then I remembered…you’re ALWAYS thinking of that person.  And, for me, the only thing more wonderful than remembering Rob on my own…is having someone remember him to me!

So I reached out.  I shared those photos…and let the other person know I was thinking of them, and remembering their loved one fondly.  The result?

Happyness…Spread!

Your Happyness Challenge for the Week Ahead: Go Ahead…Reminisce!  Remember things together!  If you are thinking of someone, let them know.  If you have a fun memory, share it.  If you know someone who is grieving, ask what that person was like.  Remember them fondly.  The stillness of August is a great time for long chats and whims of memory.  Remember the good times.  Enjoy them.  They, too, have made you who you are today!

It’s okay to walk down memory lane once in awhile…there are beautiful people there!

Spread Happyness — share your thoughts, and your favorite memories, in the comments!

8/5/16 by Grace Church
© Grace Church
grace@spreadhappyness.com

Good Times (photo credit: Grace Church)

Week #98 – Stop and smell the…(whatever makes you happy!)

Greetings Happyness Tribe — and Happy Friday!

August is just a few days away…and it’s that time of year when everything seems to slow down.  In the Northern Hemisphere, August brings nature to a big fat standstill.  The air is heavy, the trees are full, gardens are bursting with vegetables, and it’s just too damn hot to do anything but sit and take it all in!

And nothing triggers our memories more than the sense of smell.  A sniff, a whiff, a waft, or a big deep draw through the nose can transport us instantly: to our mother’s kitchen, to our first workplace, to our best friend’s first car.

But scents can trigger emotions, as well.  Our favorite Aunt’s perfume that brought with it calm and security, the smell of spaghetti sauce on the stove that meant the togetherness of family, the scent of fall leaves or the clean air after a snowstorm that leaves us feeling playful and lighthearted.

What scents stop you in your tracks?

Your Happyness Challenge for the Week Ahead: Stop and smell the ___________________!  Pay attention this week to scents that catch your attention.  Take time to let them transport you.  Give yourself a few moments to observe the details.  Etch them in your mind.  Feel them in your heart.  Speak outloud and say hi to the ones you see there…the ones smiling back at you.  That ones you could almost touch if you had just another moment.  Take note of the scent that got you there and remember it.  It is your gateway to Happyness (even if it breaks your heart once in a while).

Spread Happyness — share your thoughts, and your favorite scents, in the comments!

7/29/16 by Grace Church
© Grace Church
grace@spreadhappyness.com

Week #97 – Start spreading the news!  (The news you want to see!)

Greetings Happyness Tribe — and Happy Friday!

Another busy week in the news — and more and more I’m hearing people say they are “logging off” social media for awhile due to the onslaught of negativity, hostility, intolerance, etc. they are seeing in their newsfeeds.

But many feel frustrated that this seems to be their only choice.  Social media has become an essential tool in keeping in touch with the people who matter most in their lives: friends, family, classmates, coworkers, neighbors, even their favorite fan sites.

If this is you, you are not alone.

But before you throw the baby out with the bathwater…think for a second about what you want social media to do for you:

• Entertain?
• Keep in touch?
• Uplift?
• Inspire?
• Inform?

Now…take a look at your own timeline.  Be objective.  Are you posting the things you most want to see?

Your Happyness Challenge for the Week Ahead: Start spreading the news…the news you want to see!  If you find yourself frustrated at the onslaught of negativity on social media these days, you are not alone!  There are others who feel just like you do!  Spend a few minutes on your own timeline this week — and then ask yourself if you are contributing the things you most want to see.  If not, don’t despair.  You are just one post away from sharing a smile, a laugh, a happy story, an uplifting moment, a heartfelt thank you, or some much needed good news to someone else’s newsfeed!

Make the choice to spread light, spread love, and Spread Happyness this week!

Spread Happyness — and start spreading the news you want to see!

7/22/16 by Grace Church
© Grace Church
grace@spreadhappyness.com

Week #96 – Sit down and rock a while!

Greetings Happyness Tribe — and Happy Friday!

This week’s post comes on the heels of yet another worldwide tragedy.  I’ve got to be honest, at times like this it can seem really silly to talk about Happyness.

But then, I wonder, if this is exactly the time to double down.  As I wrote last week — these events can leave us wondering what in the world one person can do to make a difference.  But it’s important to remember that what we do might very well make a difference to one person’s world.

I traveled home last weekend for the first time since my move to California in March.  It was a fast and busy trip centered around a yearly concert in Ocean Grove’s Great Auditorium.  Between singing in the concert and visiting with my folks — people knew where they could find me: in the choir loft or on the porch of the B&B where we stayed.

All weekend long we were greeted with passers-by: some with a quick hello as they moved with purpose down the block, some with a friendly wave as they walked their pups or schlepped their beach bags up to the boardwalk, and some with a light beep as they drove along the narrow street.

But others stopped to chat, took a seat, had some coffee, or shared in our potato chips or pizza or whatever it was we were eating at that time!

There is something magical about sitting on a porch.  Something that automatically slows you down and shifts your gaze a little further beyond where you’ve been looking.  Something that opens you up and encourages you to share, to be honest, to be vulnerable.

Something that helps us connect — and maybe make a difference — to the person sitting next to us.

Your Happyness Challenge for the Week Ahead: Sit down and rock a while!  Whether you have a porch, deck, patio, balcony, or tailgate — pull up a chair, take a load off, sit a spell, have a chat, visit a bit, or rock a while!  Watch the traffic, cars park, people pass by, critters hard at work, nature doing her thing, or just observe the world moving about while you sit still.  Invite someone to join you.  Share a glass of something cold, have a conversation, meet a neighbor, visit with friends, or get to know just a little bit more about your own family.

The world is moving fast…make porch time a priority this week!

Spread Happyness — tell me, what’s your favorite place to sit down and rock a while?

7/15/16 by Grace Church
© Grace Church
grace@spreadhappyness.com

Hard at work! (photo credit: Grace Church)

Week #95 – Hard at Work?  Stay Cool! 

Greetings Happyness Tribe — and Happy Friday!

A classmate of Rob’s who works for the post office put this suggestion on Facebook: “If you feel like doing something nice today, leave a bottle of cold water for your mailman/lady🌞”.

(Thanks, Ralph!)

I thought that was a pretty cool idea — and a super easy way to Spread Happyness!

And then I got to thinking — what are some other “cool” gestures that could Spread a little Happyness to the casual connections in our lives?

The winter holidays are a natural time to leave a little something for your mail carrier, doorman, landscaper, bank teller, stylist, or garbageman/woman.

But what about the rest of the year?  Especially during the height of summer when it’s hot, stinky, overcrowded — or maybe even a little slow?

Your Happyness Challenge for the Week Ahead: Help someone else stay cool!  Leave some cold water for your mail carrier.  Provide an umbrella or pop-up tent for someone working in your yard.  Bring some good old fashioned ice cream sandwiches or novelties to your bank, stylist, mechanic, or coworkers.  Offer to make that 4 o’clock frappucino run!

And if you need more ideas — I polled a few friends a got some additional suggestions:

• Carry $5 Starbucks cards to give to someone who goes above and beyond. (Thanks, Scott!)
• Give free cupcake/yogurt/ice cream cards to someone who needs a pick-me-up. (Thanks, Heather!)
• Scroll through Stephanie Jones’ daily #givingchallenges on Instagram or Facebook! (Thanks, Stephanie!)

What other ways can we help someone else stay cool this week!

Spread Happyness — share your ideas in the comments!

7/8/16 by Grace Church
© Grace Church
grace@spreadhappyness.com

(Photo credit: Grace Church)

Week #94 – Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of…Happyness!  

Greetings Happyness Tribe — and Happy Fourth of July Weekend!

Nothing screams summer like Independence Day!  And I know many of you, if you’re reading this at all, are already off and running barefoot into a four-day summer holiday weekend!

It’s freedom times two as we celebrate “life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness” at what is — for many people — the free-est time of the year!

Are you feeling free?!
Free to be yourself?
Free to rest?
Free to be silly?
Free to choose?
Free to ____________?

Your Happyness Challenge for the Week Ahead: PURSUE HAPPYNESS!!!  Are you alive?  Are you free?  If so…I want you to make it your patriot duty to “pursue happiness” this weekend!  Get lost in a book, lounge in a hammock, go surfing, play wiffleball, get silly, run barefoot, ride a bike, take a plunge, watch some fireworks, build something, or join a parade!  Take time each day to reflect on the things that bring you the most happiness.  Jot them down.  Retain and repeat as necessary!

Remember, our constitution doesn’t guarantee us happiness…but it guarantees us the right to pursue it!

Anything less is just unpatriotic!  🙂

Spread Happyness — tell me, what Happyness will you pursue this weekend?!

7/1/16 by Grace Church
© Grace Church
grace@spreadhappyness.com

“What’s your legacy?” (photo credit: Grace Church)

Week #93 – Live Your Legacy (in memory of Sean Rollnick)

Greetings Happyness Tribe!

This week’s post comes on the heels of yet another loss in the Hopatcong community: Sean Rollnick (HHS Class of ’91) passed away in Hawaii.  He was 43.

From the outpouring of love to his Facebook page, it is clear that Sean grew up to be one of those amazingly beautiful people that walk this Earth.  As testimonial after testimonial of his direct impact on people rippled across my newsfeed, I was reminded of something I wrote last year when Rob’s memorial planter was installed in Ocean Grove:

“Through all the years we visited Ocean Grove — as children, teens, adults, and friends — I never dreamed our world would come to this.  Benches and planters were for old people, maybe even pets, but not for us.  We were young, vital, alive.  And then it occurred to me…that is the point of the plaque.  Life is about what you do, where you do it, and who you do it with.  The plaques and benches along the boardwalk are filled with legacies: “…who loved Ocean Grove…”, “…who helped us all to grow…”, “whose happiness was a day at the beach…”

If you had a plaque…what would yours say?

Your Happyness Challenge for the Week Ahead: LIVE YOUR LEGACY!!!  I’ll ask you again, if someone were to write a memorial plaque about you…what would it say?  Where would they put it?  Spend time doing that thing as if it was your last.  Imagine how you might want to be remembered…then make it a point to LIVE IT!  Do it with love…do it with laughter…and above all: do it with Happyness!

Life is short, my friends…sometimes shorter than we imagine it will be.  Don’t wait — live your legacy today!

And to Sean’s family, friends, loved ones, and beautiful brand-new baby — my deepest condolences to you in the days, weeks, months, and years ahead.  There are some losses we never get over…we just have to go on, broken-hearted as we are, and live as they would want us to — fully.

Spread Happyness — share your thoughts in the comments!

6/24/16 by Grace Church
© Grace Church
grace@spreadhappyness.com

“Watch for Rainbows” (photo credit: Grace Church)

Week #92 – Watch for Rainbows

It’s hard to talk Summer Fun when tragedy has struck (several times in one week).

Christine Grimme, Pulse, Disneyworld.  Add to that friends and family who are feeling marginalized, suffering losses, and facing serious health issues.  

Honestly — it feels ridiculous to to talk about Happyness.

Father’s Day To-Do List (by Grace Church)

Week #91 – Father’s Day is June 19th!  (Read this before you buy another necktie or coffee mug!)

I interrupt our Summer Fun List for this important reminder…

At the end of April, I gave you a heads-up that Mother’s Day was just around the corner.  Well — June is underway, and I wanted to take another moment for a little public service announcement to those of you who are celebrating Father’s Day this year:

PLAN AHEAD!

But before you go out and buy another necktie or coffee mug or singing fish, take a moment to stop and think about what the man in your life really wants.

Not that!

The other things!

I polled the guys this week:
What is that you REALLY want/wish for on Father’s Day?

I have to be honest, getting answers was like pulling teeth.  While over 50 ladies responded within hours of my Mother’s Day question, I had to ask the guys three separate times — and then only received answers when another guy intervened on my behalf.  (Why is that, guys?!)

Like the ladies, most guys don’t want something that can be bought in a store.  Hell, most of them don’t even want to leave the house!  A few brave ones even told me: “Nothing.  To do nothing.”  That doesn’t make for a sexy wish-list!

It took some arm-twisting — but a brave group of guys took me up on the question and told me what they REALLY want on Father’s Day.  And it can be summed up in four words:

FOOD, FUN, FAMILY, and a FRIGGIN’ NAP!

FOOD: From morning until night — most dads responded with some sort of food request: breakfast on the deck, donuts, waffles, burgers on the grill, ice cream in the fridge, and beer in the cooler.  Rather than buy your dad something at the mall, head to the local grocery store instead and pick him up the makings of a king-size breakfast (eggs, bacon, sausage, pancakes, waffles, OJ, and coffee), a deli lunch (fresh bread, sandwich fixings, side salads, chips, cookies, and deli pickles), or a Grill-fest dinner (burgers and dogs, ribs and chicken, or steaks and potatoes).  Make sure you back it up with his favorite dessert — you know, the one just for him (even if the kids don’t like it!).

FUN: Whether it’s a day at the park, a trip to the ballgame, an outing on the golf course, an inside day at the science museum, or the latest action movie — dads do want to have fun!  (As long as they’re with the ones they love!)

FAMILY: In almost every category (except one, see below) — the dads I heard from all wanted to spend time with their families!  Laugher, cuddles, and a few “I love you, dads” don’t hurt either!

THE NAP: Moms aren’t alone in their request for a little extra sleep!  Napping was the number one response I received from dads, too!  Extra sleep goes a LONG way!  Make sure you get some on Father’s Day!  😉

Your Happyness Challenge for the week ahead: Father’s Day is June 19th!  Do you know what the man in your life really wants?  Use this list to jump start the conversation!  Let HIM create the honey-do list for the day!  Work out a list that includes things each member of the family can check off: food, family, fun, and that all important NAP!  Just like Mother’s Day, the most important thing is to PLAN AHEAD!  Don’t leave things to the last minute.  And if it is a necktie or another coffee mug — wear it or drink from it in good health!

[A big THANK YOU to all the Dreamers & Builders who took the time to respond to my poll — and whose honest sharing made this post possible!]

Spread Happyness — PLAN AHEAD!  And share YOUR Father’s Day ideas in the comments!

6/10/16 by Grace Church
© Grace Church
grace@spreadhappyness.com